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About six months after we opened our marriage, my husband, David, stopped me at the door as I was leaving for the night.

A shocked expression painted his face. Yes, Randy and I were boyfriend and girlfriend. I was on my way out to see him at that very moment. But why was my husband surprised by this? It was David’s idea to open our marriage, and wasn’t this always one of the risks – that I might get serious with someone else?

While open marriages are becoming more and more popular in our society, with 24% of Americans agreeing that society can benefit from moving toward an open style of monogamy, in our case this type of relationship was only pushing our marriage closer to its breaking point. My husband was not happy when he learned I’d fallen for another man.

Why we opened our marriage

David and I first decided to open our marriage after years of marital strife. We had two children with different special needs who necessitated a lot of attention. A lot of my attention.

Modern woman though I might be, I soon found myself solely in charge of raising our two children while David relaxed. He’d been out of work for a couple of years and wasn’t looking for a new job, all the while we plunged deeper into dire financial straits.

Not exactly the stuff that stokes the fires of a woman’s libido. I was rarely in the mood for sex. Instead, I collapsed into bed after one stressful day after another, dealing with the kids and all the housework, cleaning up after my blissfully unemployed husband.

I felt emotionally neglected, put-upon, and humiliated as he asked for handouts from his wealthy family while I struggled with freelance work. We ended up in marriage therapy. After arguing our way through one session, my husband asked if I wanted to open our marriage.

I’d heard that more and more people were doing this and reaping the benefits of closer connections and renewed passion. But us? Despite my growing disinterest with my husband, I couldn’t imagine us dating other people while we were married to each other. Leer más

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